Dog and Bone

I couldn't help overhearing  a story about probably the dumbest owner in the world. She was apparently wandering around Pets at Home talking to someone on a mobile phone and getting very very angry. She was saying: "I'm very very annoyed. There are cat Advent calendars, but they don't have any Advent calendars for dogs. This is terrible." Well here's news for you lady, they don't have dog advent calendars because dogs can't count. They are stupid! What next? She'll get angry that they don't stock bicycles for fish?

Pining for the Fjords

Sitting at home scouring the internet, as most cats do when their owners are out, I noticed an item about a Norwegian Forest Cat which make help you make up your mind on my little web site survey. Whilst Sgt. Podge's (see here) laziness in demanding a lift home is praiseworthy, why doesn't he cut out the walking and just settle for the sleep by a warm radiator? It's what I do.

Dirty Protest

What on earth is going on in my back garden? The place is all covered with great big piles of steaming doo doo. Manure they keep calling it. Yet all I have to do is start to prepare a flower bed for use as a litter tray and I'm chased off. What hypocrisy! At least I do it free of charge.

Not Two In Tents

It was a nice long bank holiday weekend and I had some visitors named Kirsty and Carl. They were very clean and well behaved and bought me lovely tuna and treats. I think I'll let them stay again.

Urgent Treatment

Chickeny treats are back on sale at Pets at Home. What is going on there? Can't they recognise when an addict needs her fix on a regular basis. I'll have to start eating Dentabits if this carries on!

Pet Smarting

MEOW! Chickeny treats are off the menu again in Pets at Home. They're not welcome in my home.

Fat Cat Fury

I don't think I've ever been so insulted in my life. According to to my "size zero" vet, I need to lose some weight. How dare she? I'm not fat, I'm thick furred. Anyway how exactly does she think she's going to stop me eating? One claw in the face usually does the trick when it comes to getting tasty treats... and if that fails I know where the meeces are.