Tuesday, 17 February 2015

Powerpuff Cat

Sugar, spice and everything nice.
These were the ingredients chosen to create the perfect little cat.
But Professor Bacon accidentally added an extra ingredient:
Chemical X.
Thus the Powerpuff Cat was born.
Using her ultra super powers...

[I think you've got the gist by now]

Friday, 5 December 2014

Feeling Ruff

It's my Birthday and I'm not feeling too good. I think this is how you humans feel after a night on the tiles. Every night is a night on the tiles for me.

Monday, 24 November 2014

Oh I Do Like To Be Beside The Seaside...

I've come down to the seaside for a little holiday.
There's some big comfy sofas and for some reason people keep putting blankets on the bits that they don't want me to sleep on. At least that's what I think they mean.
They also don't seem to be aware that 4:30am is breakfast time, so I have to remind everyone by yowling down the house.

Thursday, 31 July 2014

Sale of the Century

I've found this for sale on the internet. No-one old me about it. However, £265,000 sounds about right. Apparently I come with a free house.

Thursday, 15 May 2014

Neighbourhood Watch

On The Lookout for Dangerous Dogs
I really can't understand why people mess around with trying to define what a dangerous dog is. They all are. Simples

Tuesday, 17 December 2013

My Tinseltime Poems

The Mice Before Christmas

'Twas the night before Christmas
And all round the house
Not a creature was stirring
'Cos I killed the mouse...

Santa Claws is Coming to Prowl

He's making a list.
And checking it twice.
He wants to find out.
Who's catching the mice.
Santa Claws is coming to prowl...

The Cat Days of Christmas

On the fifth day of Christmas.
My true love gave to me.
A pear tree.
Because I got to the partridge first.
And the turtle doves were tasty too.
I stuffed myself on the French hens.
And I couldn't manage another colly bird.

Kittymas is Coming

Kittymas is coming.
And the goose is getting fat.
Please give a portion.
To the little puddy cat.

Kitty Wonderland

Collar bells ring,
Mice aren't listening.
In the lane.
Birds are whistling.
We'll give them a fright.
We're pouncing tonight.
Prowling in a Kitty wonderland.

If I think of any more I'll add them to this list.

Monday, 4 November 2013

Be More Cat

The world has clearly got rabies, I mean stark raving mad dog.

First the local newspaper keeps printing pictures of dogs calling them "cute". They are not. There is a reason why it is derogatory to tell someone they look like a dog.

Then o2 runs the most stupid advertising campaign in the world:

"The world is amazing. Dogs are right to be excited. There are so many things to explore, experience and play with. So why wait, be more dog."

A dog gets excited at the sight of a tree or a lamp post.

I'm going back to my cat nap before I get fur-ious.