Chartered Surveying

I've just finished my big project for 2002. I've mapped out all the hot water pipes running under the floorboards. Of course, those stupid owners of mine just think that I flop myself down anywhere. Ignorant savages!

Radio 5

I don't know why I bother. I spent all day composing an email to Radio 5 and they ignored the serious point I was making.
 
Here's my original email:
 
I listened with interest to your item about Frank the Cat and I wish him a speedy recovery. He's quite right, cars are for hiding under, not for driving around in like lunatics. Maybe if you humans did the same there would be less car accidents.
 
Meow meow meow Matilda xxx
 
And this is their reply:
 
Thanks for your email, but we couldn't understand it.
 
> dfd ddfs;ojkahjkl jk jk jkljkl;jkl jkl jkl jkl jkl jkljkl
> jkjk jkljkjkl jkl jkl jkl jkjkjk jkjk jt7csdsd sdf af
> gakl;asg,l/asdg/;gakopsdfnkl,dv;vdvdsvv
 
Of course they couldn't understand it, I'm a cat... they should have got it translated at tunafish.altavista.com!!!

Hamsterdam

A historic day - the first mouse of the year! I'm just limbering up after the long winter layoff, so I didn't bother killing it this time and left it there on the stair, right there. A little mouse with clogs on... well apart from the clogs. I'll catch it again later.